Success From Restriction

Success from times of restriction, should be taught at a young age.

Restriction and Time-Out

When I was a kid and restricted to my room for something naughty I had down, I took my ‘kick the can’ attitude with me and slammed the door.

“What am I supposed to do, just sit here? Why does my room suddenly seem so quiet? Huh, when I get outta here, I’m gonna”…

I’d stew for a while, not realizing that I wasn’t being punished but rather being loved into a new behavior, but it surely felt like punishment.

Creativity In Times Of Restriction

Then suddenly, when I was aware that my adrenaline had calmed and I had set my ‘kick the can’ attitude aside for a moment.

I began to open a drawer or take something from the shelf, poke around, which led to poking into rarely visited places of my room.

And there it happened; a new found interest in things I once valued but often ignored, now became an interesting treasure trove of valuable ‘me-time’.

Restrictions Of A Pandemic

The COVID-19 ‘restrictive’ time, at first, reminded me of my naughty restrictions as a kid, until I realized, once again, I wasn’t being punished.

I was contributing to an act of love; love for my family and love for mankind. Protecting both myself and them, by following the ‘stay at home’ necessity so a scary pandemic could be brought under control, is what I fast realized.

Suddenly, just as when I was a kid, the treasure troves of my life began to speak to me. Not just the material things that surrounded me in my home, but every aspect of life that I valued.

Aspects of myself began to speak to me. My talents, my interests, hobbies and the contributions I knew I was capable of offering to others while I was in isolation.

In that moment I became excited as to the possibilities, projects, love-offerings I had to bring to this difficult and unusual time.

Keeping myself busy and productive made me realize that this strange and eerie time of restriction would only be limited to my lack of creativity. Suddenly the possibilities became endless.


So…. Bring It On!!

Tools. Many years ago, probably when I was fifteen and my parents didn’t have much in the way of resources, I discovered my love for beautiful things.

Fortunately I had my own room, but my room just had a bed, a dresser and little else.

My Room! It became my entire world, as a young teenager, that couldn’t wait to grow up and have a home of my own. So my room became the first experiment into the adult home I would one day have.

Discover Your Talents

It was then that I realized that the only thing restricting me from having a fabulous bedroom, was me. If I was able to purchase a few items with my little earned money, I could make my room anything I wanted it to be.

Can you believe, I began picking through other peoples road-side discarded stuff? A chair that wasn’t broken, just ugly. An end table that was scratched and warn. Stuff. Trash. Other people’s warn out stuff soon became the object of my treasures.

I taught myself how to sand the scratches out of wood and oil a nice finish back to them. Took apart upholstered furniture and figured out how to reupholster it with new fabric.

Learned to work with the tools that we had in our garage. Yep, I even managed a table saw, and at one point a gas-fueled chain saw.

Paint, wallpaper, fabric, wood anything and everything became my challenge to utilize for the beauty of my environment. Pandemic isolation was no different! Restricted to home? Bring it on!


Success Starts With Imagination – Not Money

Income. By the age of sixteen, I was earning money. My mom had a little beauty salon and I knew I was going to go into that field of work every time I step foot in her salon.

Like the film Steel Magnolias, where Dolly Parton had a beauty shop on her property and not only fixed hair for the town’s women but generated a safe place for women to help fix each other.

I recognized the beauty of a safe women’s place in my mama’s salon long before I needed to think about a job.

When you work for  family, there are often few restrictions as to how fast you can climb the ladder of success.

Show a genuine interest in the job at hand and you can pretty much call the shots. Well, I was only sixteen, but told my mother (no, I didn’t ask), I wanted to apprentice in her salon.

She, of course being a mom who finds pride in a motivated child, was enthusiastic. By the age of eighteen, I had my license, a full book of clients and was making money while all my high school friends were poor and going to college.

Creativity Is What Earns Success

There are few restrictions in life when you are a creative person! This career took me many amazing places in my life:

  • New York for two years
  • Washington DC for eight years where I did both theatre and runway work on the side, which means my social life was flourishing
  • Then… I had my first child. Not married. Father, a billionaire and a foreigner who contributed ‘nada’ to the first seventeen years of my son’s life.
  • What do you suppose I did? Yep! I went back to my home town, created a beauty salon in my home, just like in Steal Magnodlias and was able to raise my children (yes, later had three more), as a single mom and provide for them.

First Book

Then… they grew up, I retired and moved to Brazil for three years and wrote my first book. A fun, gossip, beauty-shop kind of book.

Of course you can buy it on Amazon, but be forewarned, some of it is rather risqué! Confessions of a Hairdresser.

Confessions of a Hairdresser
Confessions of a Hairdresser

As life unfolded from that point in my life, and forty years a hairdresser was behind me, writing and filming became my passion and desire for a new career.

Maintaining my license was something I new I would never close a door on. You know, they say, never burn bridges.

Just because I wasn’t working in the beauty industry any longer didn’t mean it wasn’t still in my blood.


Restriction No More

With film, now in my blood, I am as qualified for ‘on set’ hair and makeup as any one in the industry.

Maybe more, because from 1968 until 2020 I’ve seen and done it ALL when it comes to fashion, hair, makeup and looks!


Define Success For Yourself

Success, for me, is all about being in the driver’s seat of your life, not about how much money you make.

Having successfully afforded my own life after high school, which enabled me to buy my own sports cars, name brand cloths, travel like a crazy person, and  yes, even go to school on my terms.

Curiosity led me to study languages, just because I wanted to expand my mind, my communication and my understanding of other cultures.

Greek was first, then Japanese (rather extensively), Arabic, Italian and Spanish. Then, of course, three years in Brazil and Portuguese was added to this little hairdresser’s repertoire of life experiences.

I loved having no one telling me what to do! Late teens until my late 20’s, that was success for me!

Success As A Mom

From my late twenties until I hit fifty, success was entirely about being a stay-at-home mom AND a business woman who could manage both worlds while raising four children as a single mom.

And guess what? All my kids are quite proficient in cutting and coloring hair! Something that came in handy when the pandemic hit.

My sons asked for a diagram of hair cutting instructions from me. For nearly 2-years they DIY!

IMG_7190 (1)
INSTRUCT A SIMPLE MAN’S TRIM (Don’t laugh at my drawing!)

Restrictions Inspire Creativity

Creative people rarely experience restrictions in life because we are always looking for new ways to utilize our talents.

We wiggle our way around the structures set in life. Structures we believe are for everyone, except us.

Yet often within the structures of life, even the meek and quiet can discover an imagination that will bloom. Success is most often found here.

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